Saturday, September 30, 2017

Being Aiza Kamal: Final Year!

Hi everyone! 

Today's entry is going to be a more personal story! Asyik membebel review product je boring jugak nak baca kan? I pun boring jugak nak menaip. Hoho. So we'll take a break from reviewing this time around and I'm going to share a little bit about me! But before that, let me just put this photo here! 

This is me attempting to recreate a photo I took during my foundation year

So last Monday, I've started my final year here on Nottingham Malaysia!! This is my last year, my last chance to strive for the best! Everything I've worked for, everything I dream of, depends on this very last year. Hoh! The pressure is real, y'alls! 

I kinda screwed up in my second year due to personal problems. You know, I used to wonder how can someone be so affected and screw up their studies over someone else's problems. Like, masalah orang lain kot, kau sibuk fikir buat apa? Until I finally wore that shoe! No, we're not thinking of their problems. We're actually thinking of the consequences of that person's problems. And when that person is someone close to you, a lot of that consequences affect you. Of course, there's a matter of the betrayal and heart break, whatever not. These things can demotivate you!

It was horrible and I was so stressed out. There were even times when I went into depressive state and spent a lot of time sleeping. My mind was completely blank, it basically consumed me. I had trouble focusing on my studies because I kept thinking about it at random times. I leave my assignments to the very last minutes and of course they were terrible essays and reports. Anyway, long story short, I went through all that and pretty much on my own. And I flunked my exams. 

My tutor actually offered me to fill in the Extenuating Circumstances form and she was ready to back me up on it. To anyone in Nottingham who's reading this, yes, you can do that for personal reasons too! But it was too much work for one form, so I said no, thinking I could handle it. Turns out, I couldn't. 

Hence, this final year, I have a lot to make up for! I need to work hard (and smart) on my project and increase my grades. This is my last chance to turn everything around! *flexes biceps* I got my spirit back in the summer, did a lot of thinking and finally woke up one day thinking, it's not worth it to waste my life away over this stupid thing! So I started the autumn semester with new motivation! Huh! Chaiyok Jaja! Wish me luck, yeah?

And to everyone in their final year, also, I wish you all good luck and all the best! Let's all graduate in 2018!!

Final Year, Final Battle.
Love, Aiza.

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